There is no denying that dating is difficult, and in the age of apps, it can sometimes seem particularly overwhelming. If you've swiped yourself, you probably know that after hours of looking at profiles they all seem to blend together.
On the other hand, you might not be getting the type of attention you want and deserve. But learning how to make a dating profile that gets you meaningful responses is truly not impossible, even though it seems that way sometimes. In fact, one of the OG dating sites, Match, is looking to solve that very problem with the launch of " AskMatch. The AskMatch coaches are professional dating coaches and certified matchmakers, and Match members can call directly from the app when they need a little boost with the whole love thing.
Their services touch on a wide range of needs. For real, the coaches can help you with anything from setting up a profile to dealing with real-time issues, like being ghosted or having that "what are we? Ultimately, the AskMatch team is concerned with making dating feel human. As Match's chief dating expert Rachel DeAlto tells Bustle, "There are so many challenges to dating, and so many people who are frustrated.
We want a way for people to both release that frustration and get pragmatic tips. Below, DeAlto gives some seriously pro advice about making a meaningful profile that helps find that connection you crave.
Love is out there! But don't start off by saying your angry and putting out those negative vibes. If you have nothing nice to say, says DeAlto, don't say it. Especially if you're feeling down on dating, it can sometimes feel like being "you" is the last person you should be in order to find someone. Not true, my friends. Not true.
How to get more online dating responses
So how is the lid supposed to fit you if you aren't being yourself? If you're corny for example, own it, she says. If you like dad jokes, then that's your thing. Sometimes the things we think will make us "unloveable" are actually what make us most endearing. DeAlto says that something she sees a lot in dating profiles are mantras, life theories, and popular sayings.
Online dating: first message tips
Things like "work hard, play hard" or "stay positive. Yes, it's all about those positive, happy pictures. But when a dating expert takes a look at their pictures, DeAlto says, they have sunglasses on in every one and there is like, a toilet bowl in the background. DeAlto says when it comes to pics, post five to seven pictures max, add a full body picture, and make sure you look at least a little bit happy. Her other piece of advice for pictures? Try to add shots that can act as conversation starters.
Maybe it's you with a pet or on a trip. Anything that can make reaching out a little easier for people. You know that old writing advice from school, "show don't tell? Think of it like an advertisement of your interests. Let people know what you actually enjoy or how you spend your time. You definitely don't want to seem like you are using the same greeting for everyone, she says.
Our online dating message tips to get (and keep) the conversation going
That is super important. DeAlto says that you want to both personalize the greeting with someone's name, and base your initial conversation on something in their profile.
Sometimes people want to meet right away because they get frustrated with the whole online communication thing. But people need a little while to warm up and get a feel for each other.
How to write a great first message
The dating experts try to encourage people to keep communicating on Match for a little bit longer, as it is important to developing a bit of a connection before you meet. But for now, while you're on the app, light and fluffy is where you want to keep it. Stick with flirting and banter, since you're only really going to get to know each other in person. Again, while dating can seem overwhelming, taking it step by step makes it all the easier. You aren't in this alone! And really, there is help out there for all your dating woes.
Match's chief dating expert explains how to get more meaningful responses on dating apps
By Annakeara Stinson. The biggest thing, says DeAlto, is creating a positive profile.
Ask a question as a conversation starter. In fact, always ask questions. That being said, you don't need to go too far into your life story before the first date.